The reflections of this article come from a confluence of many visits to local churches and the fact that next week is transition week, when many pastors will be arriving at new appointments. In both cases, the question of how we receive new people is important.
Many years ago, my cousin and his family were staying with us as we concluded a vacation shared by both families. On Sunday morning, I left at my usual time to go to the church and prepare for worship. As the time for the service approached, they arrived and found a seat. Hoping they had a good experience, I was pleased by how many people went over to speak to them, both before and after the service. As we arrived home for lunch together, my cousin had an interesting observation. He praised the church for its friendliness. He said that many people went out of their way to greet them and say, “Hi.” However, he went on to note that after the initial greeting was shared, there was no attempt to engage them.
This observation has stuck with me. Friendliness is a good start, but it is not a full welcome. And a good welcome is not the same as hospitality. The truth is that many people are looking for connection. This doesn’t come from a hello or a handshake, though these are a good start. Beyond these comes intentional conversation in which we both share a part of ourselves and seek to know the other person at a deeper level. I remember Bishop Edwards saying that asking questions about the life of another is the greatest complement, because it assumes that person is interesting and worth knowing.
Certainly we all see different ways people engage others in our local church.
- Some arrive, sit where they feel comfortable and speak to relatively few people.
- Some are deeply engaged in conversations within a group, but once that is over, they do not engage others outside the group.
- Some are friendly and will offer a greeting, but that is as far as it goes.
- Some not only say, “Hi,” but will engage in conversation. They will offer the gift of interest and curiosity about your life.
I realize that as congregations regather after COVID, concerns about health still linger. In larger congregations, people are wary about greeting a long-tenured member as a visitor. Thus, rather than making a mistake, they choose not to engage. Just this week, someone greeted me in what I consider an ingenious way. She said, “I haven’t been back for very long, so I don’t know if you are a member or not, but I don’t recall seeing you before. I’m glad you’re here. Can you tell me your name?”
Offering hospitality to the stranger, whether they are new to us or new to the setting, is important. This is more than simply being friendly. It also is more than extending a good welcome. It includes making them feel comfortable and that they are valued. It not only means helping them understand their surroundings but also implying that they have gifts that would be of benefit to those who have already connected.
Certainly this is true in our churches. It also is true in our collegial relationships. As new pastors begin a season of ministry in the Corridor District, they not only join with new congregations, but also with us, the clergy and leaders of the district. I hope everyone will be friendly to those who are joining us. But beyond that, I pray that each of us will discover ways to truly welcome them, and extend hospitality to them.
I encourage you to reach out to these people, or to other pastors whom you have not met do to COVID restrictions. Take time to give them a call or invite them to lunch. If you are in a small group, invite them to join you. Remember, they are leaving a place where they have been connected and are seeking support in their new place of ministry.
Below is a listing of the changes that are taking place in the district. I am grateful for all who have labored well in their places of ministry, especially during the difficult times of the pandemic. Each have shared gifts with congregations and with colleagues that have enriched lives. I also look forward with hopeful anticipating of what God will do in and through those who now join us.
Leaving Appointments: Bryan Faggart, Becca MacDonald, Robert Simpson, Mick Raynor, Karen Whitaker, Ross Carter, Darcy Knight, John Upton, Larry Bowden, Donald Daniel, Jimmy Weaver, Anggie Thompson, Sherei Jackson, Rani Woodrow, Judson Dunlap, Sue Eldon, Trey Harris, Francis Kinyua, Daniel Jackson, Creighton Alexander,
Changing appointments within the Corridor District: Donna Banks (Epworth), Han Sol Sim, (The CityWell Associate)
New to the Corridor District: Steve Murphy (Aldersgate), Rachel Meyers (All Saints – commissioned Deacon), Brandon Miller (Christ – commissioned Deacon), Neal Brantley (Efland), Amanda Hedden (Emmanuel – student pastor), Ray Warren (Front Street), Stan Smith (Grace-CaVel), Willie Teague (Hightower Charge), Elizabeth Tyson (McMannen), Donnie Mitchell (Mt. Sylvan), David King (Mt. Zion), Mike Sciascia (New Brook), Tony Westbrook (Rock Creek – student pastor), Daniel Rigsby (Rougemont Charge – student pastor), Curtis Hammock (Salem), Billy Sander (Saxapahaw), Seyun Hwang (St. Paul), Elaine Heath (The Church at Spring Forest), A.C. Brock (Trinity), Jamison Doehring (University Executive Pastor)
Blessings,
Mike